YES, YOU READ THAT CORRECTLY. MY BLOG HAS BEEN DISCOVERED. My secret blogger life is no longer a secret. My life is in shambles. My deepest, darkest secrets of Coconut Macaroons, Sweaters, and Doctor Who have been revealed. What will I do now….
It was just a regular day in the Chemistry Class of the Marshall when the Gang, as they are commonly called, broke in. After months of espionage, of trying to steal my data vault and finding nothing, pretending to be “my friends,” and secretly reading over my shoulder while supposedly immersed in the Practice of Statistics, the code was finally cracked. The URL was found.
The crime was committed in broad daylight, with several highly confused witnesses in the area. They took the risk of taking pictures, as the crime was being committed, which may possibly lead to them being hunted down, as The Gang does not like to leave any evidence behind. The crime being in public may have actually been deliberate, however, due to the increased amount of people that could hear about My Secret Blog Life.
Let’s meet the culprits of this heinous crime, shall we?
Other Aliases: “The Friend” and “Aditi”
Description: She is extremely skilled in espionage. She slowly and carefully gathers information by posing as a friend (look at her, pretending that the dog likes her…it’s pretty obvious what he thinks…), and does not let the provider become aware that she has all of this information. Then, she transfers it all of to The Gang, giving them almost all of the data that they need to commit the crime. Is known for obsessing over Tom Hiddleston, and receiving payment in cookies. However, she does have a weakness: my desserts.
Other Aliases: “The Screamer,” “Neesh,” and “Neerali”
Description: She seems innocent, with that nice smile, but she is the leader of the Gang. She gathered information from The Deetster and worked efficiently with Tuls. She is capable of screaming at an extremely high volume, in order to burst the ear drums of those in her vicinity.
Other Aliases: “She who must not be photographed” and “Tulsi”
Description: This is one of the few pictures available of Tulsi. She shuns cameras and speaks very little. Is capable of running on ice. Is also a master of disguise, as she is doing undercover work at an Indian party in this picture. She is the second in command, right after Neesh. More information on this member of The Gang is extremely limited.
Other Aliases: “Buuuuuuddy” and “Varsha”
Description: Seemingly nice, this 5’ 9” being can stealthily stalk the small. She cannot be escaped, with her long legs and immense speed (from years of playing “tennis,” which may actually be code for practicing her superpowers), she is easily always less than a step behind all those that must be followed. She is also commonly known for spouting scientific facts and declaring, “William Herondale is Mine.” Is also known for insulting Doctor Who, a Class A Felony. She pretends to be on your side, and ends up revealing her true intentions at the last second.
Other Aliases: “Samatha” and “The Nice One”
Description: This one is the background player. She pretends to be the nicest of them all, that she will never reveal your secrets, but let her in on a Secret Santa group, and the beans will be spilt. She is known for being extremely confused on matters of Harry Potter, Doctor Who, and Tom Hiddleston.
Other Possible Alias: “Dhruti”
Description: Nothing is known about this member of The Gang, not even her real name. It is likely that “Dhruti” is not even her alias. It is also highly possible that she is of even higher ranking than Neesh, and is in fact, the leader of this crime, and every crime ever committed.